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Digging the DERT, looking for 2016 and beyond.


August 6, 2014 by tommy

For the first time since 1993, there are no immediate plans to hold DERT
beyond next year’s outing in Bristol.

While it has moved around the country quite nicely, and even been
international, crossing the border into Scotland, there are no new venues on the horizon.

DART in Boston, and now Toronto, looks to be holding the baton. Perhaps we can all have a rush across the pond next October instead.

Looking at the list of entrants, it seems that there are many teams who have
practiced hard and entered and enjoyed the labour of other’s fruit, but not yet stepped up to the organising platform.

Reading like a What’s what of our favourite metal flexing pastime, these
teams have also danced, and competed and still found breath to meet the challenge of hundreds of beer and gin swilling, sleeping-bagged terpsichoreans.

Ryknild Rabble twice
Thrales also twice
Mabel Gubbins
Stone Monkey (five)
Kingsmen/Sallyport (twice)
Whip the Cat
Black Swan (Twice)
North British/Lamb and Flag (a few)
High Spen/Short Circuit

Mayhap ’tis time for a few plans from putative organisers.

Sheffield would be great again and there’s lots of expertise and wooden
floored pubs there already. Oh, and a new team.

Some have suggested a trip to France, but Dorset Buttons are nearer, and
what about those rare Bristol boozers. it’s the place to be In 2015!!


If only there was a team in Brum. What’s that I hear, not only has the city become the place for a now highly regarded accent but the Jockey Morris has a thriving rapper team and a myriad of wonderful wooden floors in many real ale pubs.

In the North East, Monkseaton would make an ideal venue: beer, whipping wind off the North Sea and true Geordie hospitality!

While the fair city of Durham has a built in pub crawl and the perfect venue in the Town Hall, but none of the local teams has yet risen to the challenge, perhaps an ex-pat should
organise one there.

Foreign teams have always been keen apart from Jack the Rapper, where the
price of the Norwegian beer and more so the Gin would cause ruptures of the wallet. One of Northgate has even suggested that Cardiff, with a new team, would prove to be an ideal and welcoming rapper city.

And there’s always Edinburgh and in particular, Leith where the Polithe are friendly and rarely dithmitheth uth!

But in reality the choice city calling out for a massive pub crawl is Manchester where at least one prize winning team resides.

After all how hard can it be to organise a DERT?

At the end of an email there’s

* Masses of help from the SDU

* Chance to put right all those DERT niggles from years gone by.

* A very generous float to get it away

* Technical help, judges/rules/trophies

* Many precedents to fall back on

And the joy in knowing that you have made another set of sweaty hedonists
happy for another year.

Phil’s yer man to get in touch with.


  1. Keith Thompson says:

    It may be something Goathland would take on using our new Building which is planned as the SDU HQ amongst other uses, the Moors Rail Way for transport & Whitby pubs for the competition . We will talk to Phil at Whitby

  2. John Asher says:

    The Kingsmen and Sallyport have actually hosted it three times – in 1994, 1999 and 2009. They will presumably host it again in 2019 to mark the Kingsmen’s 70th and Sallyport’s 50th anniversaries.

  3. Paul says:

    Didn’t East Saxon Sword host it in 1995?

    • Phil says:

      Indeed, in Leytonstone, but they didn’t actually call it DERT… As I remember it was almost the only Rapper competition without an organised fraternising or meeting place apart from the competition venue which was emptied at 5.30…

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